We like to talk a lot about assumptions on this show. One of the assumptions that you're probably making is that your boss is giving you all of the feedback that you need to improve. Think about this. So often, I hear stories about people who end up getting laid off or end up on a performance improvement plan or for whatever reason, they get surprised by some action by their company. Now, setting aside the fact that many companies are indeed practicing performance management. In ad hoc and chaotic ways. There are also opportunities that we often make assumptions about. We assume that our managers know what they're doing. For example, we assume that our manager is going to tell us when something didn't go as well as it could have gone. We assume that our managers are paying attention. That they are watching us. That they are watching. How we behave in difficult situations. That they know exactly what we're doing. Or at least they know all of the good things that we're doing. These assumptions can come back to bite you. But I want to give you one simple tool. One question that can shift this dynamic more in your favor. I'm not saying that it will fix everything. But remember that with any kind of intervention. A lot of the things that we talk about on the show are interventional in nature. So intervention in this case. What I mean is some kind of change in order to stop a particular situation or a series of events. Or to change direction. That's the idea of an intervention. We're intervening. With any kind of intervention. What we care about. Is a dose response relationship. In other words. We want to know. What is the. You know kind of the balance. The ROI. So to speak. Because if it takes a lot. Of effort. To accomplish some change. Then there may be other better ways to spend that same effort. Right so. In this particular intervention. I wouldn't say that this is going to fix all of your. Assumptions about your manager. But. It can give you. Better feedback. So if all you're doing is waiting for your performance review. To get feedback. Or if you're hoping that your manager. Is going to systematically provide you feedback. In your one-on-ones. Even good managers. Don't necessarily do this. Perfectly all the time. Right so. Here's what I recommend. There's a mindset. Here that I'm going to recommend. And then there is a specific tactical question. That you can ask your manager. To trigger the right kind of thinking processes. To get you the feedback you need. The mindset. Is that your manager. Giving you feedback. Is your responsibility. What does this mean? It means that. Instead of waiting for your manager. To pick up the baton. And give you feedback. You are going to seek it out. Getting. Your feedback from other people. If you own that responsibility. You have better incentive alignment. To seek that feedback out. In the first place. So if you are responsible. If you take responsibility. For gathering the feedback. That you need. To make the changes for yourself. Then any additional feedback. That your manager brings to you. Is only going to enhance. That responsibility. Also your manager. Will very likely appreciate this. Especially. This is going back to that dose response. That ROI conversation. Your manager will appreciate. You asking for feedback. As long as you do it. In particularly tactful ways. So the tactical question. That I am going to give you today. And you can go and ask your manager this. Almost any time. This is more of an advice. Question. And that's the framing. That is the difference here. That's why it makes it a good question to use. So the question goes like this. What do you think. Will hold me back. From growing. You can modify this question. A little bit. What do you think will hold me back. From getting X promotion. For example. But if you ask this in an open way. Then you are. Your manager can choose. To interpret this. However they want to. Your manager may come back at you and say. What do you mean by growth? This means that there are. Potentially multiple answers to this question. They may have. A rich kind of tapestry of feedback. To provide to you. For different areas. So you can either be very tactical. And very specific. What do you think. Held me back in that meeting. Or what do you think. Has held me back. During my onboarding. Is there an attitude. Or some other behavior. That you think is holding me back. The key. I guess differentiator here. Is that. You're asking them. Not to provide you. With event oriented. Feedback. How did I do. But instead. With kind of forward looking. What's holding me back. Is advice for what to do. Going forward. And this is critical. This is critical. It changes the conversation. Away from the potential negative. Which is hard to provide. To potential positive. Which is much more energizing to provide. If you're a leader. If you're a coach. Most managers enjoy. Enjoy giving advice. We enjoy looking forward and saying. Here's how you can do better. In the future. The things that are holding you back. Can be translated into. What is the linchpin. And you can fill in the blanks. So take this feedback. And try to fill in the blanks. If they say well. I think the thing that's holding you back. Is that. You're not speaking up. And sharing your. Your opinion often enough. Or the thing that I think. Can take you to the next level is. Right. So you can kind of use both of those framings. Depending on. What kind of relationship you have with your manager. What kind of advice do they tend to give you. Do they tend to focus on behaviors. That you've already engaged in. Or do they tend to focus on. Positive coaching. Or providing you with. Again affirmative advice. Or positive advice. Rather than. You know feedback on. Previous behaviors. So both of these. Do have kind of a forward lean. Right because. Even though you're asking about. What's holding you back. That the intent of that. Is not to litigate that behavior. But instead to say oh. You know. I assume that you could make it. That you could do well. That you could grow. That you could achieve your goals. If this was not in the way. Right so you're looking for roadblocks. That mindset shift. Can be monumentally different. In tone. Versus saying. Can you tell me how I did. Rate me. Judge me. You know provide me. With some kind of objective analysis. Of my past behaviors. Instead you're goal oriented. Right again. This is this is about a framing. That can give your manager. The opportunity to provide. Advice. Rather than judgment. Thanks so much for listening. To this episode of developer T. If you try this out. Please let me know. You can email me. At developer T at gmail.com. You can also send. A message in the discord community. That's developer T dot com slash discord. Thanks so much for listening. And until next time. Enjoy your tea.