In today's episode, I want to share with you what is probably in my top five effective behaviors for leaders, for managers, for directors, VPs, all the way up to the executive level. And then all the way down through junior engineers. Every single person in this chain can benefit from adopting this behavior. And it doesn't require any special skills. The thing that makes it hard is that it requires some thoughtful communication. Before we get to the habit, I want to kind of give you the background as to why this is such an important and effective habit for you to pick up. If you think about part of your role or part of your kind of process of improvement for your career, for yourself, as eliminating the biggest risks, right? If you, you know, subscribe to the idea that a lot of figuring out what to do is actually mostly figuring out what not to do. That sometimes things will fill in the blank as long as you can avoid major risk. And so risk reduction, right? From a kind of a conceptual standpoint, risk reduction is an ideal investment. If you're reducing your risk, then you have more opportunities unfettered to succeed. So if you think about the many things that might produce risk over your career, there's one that will stay with you the whole time. And it just so happens that it's you. You are a risk to your own career. And there are many ways that this plays out. There's many ways that you pose a risk for yourself or to yourself. But the most important thing is that you're not about risk reduction. And that's why I'm talking about risk reduction. And that's why I'm talking about risk reduction. And that's why I'm talking about risk reduction. And that's why I'm talking The most salient, the most salient example of this that will last all the way through, no matter what level you are, is your ability to understand what someone else is communicating to you. Think about this. If you misunderstand what someone else is communicating to you, if you hear something, and you assume that they mean one thing, but they actually mean another, you're going to lose your opportunity to understand what someone else is communicating to Rather, this can snowball into major miscommunications, which can result in significant setbacks in your career. We won't go into specifics, but I'm sure you can think back to very recent examples of this, where you made assumptions about what a person meant. And this is kind of our default mode of communication. Why is that? Well, mostly because our communication is intended to be low effort. When I say intended, what I mean is we are adapted. We focus on low effort communications. This is an efficient form of communication. We try to convey as much meaning as is necessary and no more by default. Why is that? Well, because our brain is trying to be. It's a process. Efficient as possible. Using as little energy as necessary. So this is a survival instinct. Being able to communicate quickly is beneficial. It's beneficial because you don't have to spend a ton of time translating or understanding each other. All right. But this is beneficial in the sense that it would have helped you, you know, 100,000 years ago. It would have helped you. It would have helped you understand your, you know, the norms of your small village. It would have helped you understand when somebody is making a particular sign or saying a particular word, what they really mean by that. It's cultural heuristics that you're using. And these cultural heuristics, they can be valuable even now. We use these to build rich communication with each other. It helps us feel comfortable. When we're around our friends and we can share inside jokes. These are a type of heuristic, right? They are heuristic to a deeper, richer kind of history together. So let's be careful in trying to throw out these heuristics altogether, trying to throw out the quick communication as if it is fundamentally bad. But it does present a risk. Alongside the benefits that we've already talked about. The risk is miscommunication. Offending someone is a very simple example of this in our personal lives. Making a joke that is at someone's expense is a risky communication behavior. Now, sometimes that risk is minuscule and the downside is worth it. The quick communication that we have with another person, the upside turns out to outweigh the downside. But when we're in a professional scenario, when we're talking to, let's say, another team member, or especially when we're talking to somebody like a stakeholder or a collaborative partner, this one behavior is going to provide so much risk mitigation for you. It's very simple. All you're going to do is restate what the person is telling you back in your own words. Restate what they're telling you back in your own words. You're summarizing what they are saying or you are restating it in words that you would understand that are natural to you. And they get a chance to correct you. So this looks something like, what I hear you saying or what I think I'm hearing is. And then you proceed to explain what you think you're hearing. So you might be listening. You're listening to this. And if we were sitting in a room together, you could come back to me and say, Jonathan, I think what I hear you saying is that when I'm listening to someone, one way I can show them that I'm listening is by trying to restate what they're saying with my own terminology. Now, here's the thing. You'll notice that I didn't say anything different there. I'm restating with the same underlying meaning. We're using different words to convey the same fundamental truth or the same fundamental assertions that the other person is making. And here's what this does. One, we already mentioned it. You are showing them that you're listening intently. Giving somebody else your time. This is a hugely influential decision. Someone your time, they notice. They notice if you're listening and they notice if you're not listening. So by restating what they're saying in your own words, you are showing them that you're listening. You're also encoding this for yourself. You're creating the meaning. You're making the connections. The neural pathways are getting formed. When you have to draw out the meaning and summarize something for yourself, rather than just parroting back exactly. The words that they're saying back to them. If you are summarizing, if you're synthesizing it. Especially if you can then go on to talk about it in context to something else that you're talking about. Then you're creating the connections. Now, perhaps the most important thing that you're doing here. All of that is risk reduction, by the way. What we just talked about. It's all risk reduction. But the biggest risk reduction that we can accomplish with this. Is giving the other person the opportunity to correct us. Making sure that they respond with something like, that's right. That's correct. Yep, you've got it. And here's what that does. Okay. One, of course, you have the very likely potential that at some point somebody said, no, that's not quite right. You are going to be wrong about what you're hearing. Okay. And this is the part that most people miss. That we assume we understand just because we know the meaning of the words that the person is saying. That we have some context for what they're saying. But when we restate it back to them, we have a chance. We have a chance to refine our understanding. This is a huge opportunity. Right. And we must pay attention to this. This is a huge opportunity to refine our understanding. To check it against what the other person is saying. To check it against what the other person is actually intending to say. Right. So, this very basic mirroring technique. It's not traditional mirroring in that you are trying to emulate what the other person is saying. You're just mirroring back what they're saying to them. They get a chance to critique you. They get a chance to correct you. To say, no, you don't quite have it. I'm going to add another layer for you to understand. So, you walk away with better understanding. The final thing that it does is this person feels. The sense of reception. All right. In other words, they have asserted that you are correct. They have asserted that you understand what they're saying. Psychologically speaking, when you look at someone and you say, yep, you're right. That builds credibility. Right. That builds your credibility. If you're the person that they are saying, yep, you're right to. Then they have it. They have this opportunity to confront. That you have indeed understood them. And now you are more credible because you've taken the time to fully parse what they're saying. Now, compare what this feels like. Imagine that you were trying to explain something to somebody. And they didn't engage with you at all. They said, yeah, that makes sense. And that's where they leave it. It's very possible that whatever landed in their head is pretty close to right. If they were to restate it back to you, you might say, yeah, that's. That's pretty much it. But the truth is the signal of reception, right? The acknowledgement that you provide, that there's a feeling that my message has been received. That my meaning has been received. Someone truly understands me. This is a bridge building technique with other people. And it's not a fake bridge. It's not you, you know, blowing smoke. It is actually. It is actually a genuine connection because you're taking the time to refine your ability to hear what they're saying. So I want you to try this. It's a very cheap and high leverage behavior to add to your repertoire. And all you're really doing here is if there's. You don't even have to have a hint of doubt. You can just do this just for the benefit of the practice of it in your next conversation, especially in your next professional conversation. Okay. When someone gives you some bit of information. Replay it back to them. Replay it back. Try to capture whatever they said. And repeat it back to them. And the key factor here again is do it in your own words. And your goal. Your goal in that effort. Is to keep iterating with that person until they say. Yeah. Yeah, that's right. Thank you. Thank you so much for listening to today's episode of developer T. I hope you enjoyed this episode. If you think that someone that you know would benefit from this. Go ahead and share it with them. They can find it at developer. Developer T.com or probably more naturally these days. You can just go straight into your podcast player and search for developer T and you're going to find it. You can also share this show directly from whatever podcasting app you're using. Share this episode with them. Thank you so much for listening. And until next time. Enjoy your tea.